Out of control Sgt

Cadets Ask the Staff
1

I’m awfully sorry for my frequent moans on here, it’s just that there’s so many problems on my squadron that really irk me to high heavens.

As it has been previously discussed, one of the Sgts (I posted a thread about her when she was a Cpl) seems to have something against me. If you want to know the backstory look at my previous posts and you’ll get the bigger picture.

I’ve been disliking my squadron even more, it’s just changed so much,even moreso having returned to the sqn after a break for exams. (I got my results today, they were quite good imo. 3A*s,2As,2Bs and a C) The dynamics have changed so much; we’re not allowed to talk at break, obvious favouritism from NCOs and tons of petty politics.

As for the Sgt, she has recently been promoted, and has been even more ridiculous. I, as the squadron’s own [TEA MAKER]/bog scrubber/window cleaner/NAAFI shopkeeper all rolled into one, have been given the new duty as this recently promoted Sgt’s personal slave. I already do all the above roles on a nightly basis and now I have to basically be her slave. I have to measure her tea precisely, I really shouldn’t be making tea to non-staff NCOs but as I have been snitched on for not doing it, I now have to or a massive bollocking ensues. For ‘massive [TELLING OFF]’:read seven NCOs giving me a verbal hiding in their mess. I also have to fold the Sgt’s PT kit and put her sweet wrappers into the bin for her.

Yes, you ARE reading this. I do have to do this. I have repeatedly went to the OC and even the WWO about this. But nothing has happened. I am her subordinate so I have to obey her was the verdict by both OC and WWO. She is an NCO and I am a lowly sixteen year old cadet -we are a fruitless people, sixteen year old cadets- and she is a 17 y/o SNCO so I have to follow her orders. She talks to me like I am six,not 16. Very condescending. Cadets are voiceless, ime. We don’t get listened to or noticed.

I understand I am not the most bolshy,ballsy or extroverted person. I might not shout the loudest but the more junior cadets seem to ask me about little things like drill and uniform even though Sgt X is in charge of cadet’s drill and uniform. They know they can get an answer from me, whereas they would get [TOLD OFF] for not knowing things from Sgt X. I know I am not NCO material, but I would say I’m a respected cadet.

I know I might be younger looking, not as pushy or loud as some but that’s no way to treat me like dog poo. Any advice how to get this nipped in the vpbud even though it’s wildly out of control?

That was very cathartic, apologies for littering your forum with my ranting and raving. V

2

It appears you are venting in the wrong way. If it has become this much of a problem then You need to explore what actions you can take. Venting on a site like this will not help you solve the issue, talking to someone like your OC is the right way to do this. If they are not listening then it maybe more serious and may require your wing to deal with this issue.

3

I agree with Rob here. You need to voice this via your Chain of Command. If you get nowhere with them then my advice would be to speak to your WSO for your Sqn. Failing that then a letter from your parents will do the job. As far as I am concerned this could become a safeguarding issue as it can be classed as bullying as you feel singled out by one individual. I would keep kicking up the chain of command until you get something done about it. Even if they agree to talk to the individual who is treating you this way it is better than nothing.

4

You need to talk to your staff about this. I would not expect a cadet to be folding kit for an NCO or throwing away her rubbish. I would also not expect a cadet to be making tea/coffee for others repeatedly. No NCO or adult should be above making the tea - you take it in turns. The only people who should not be expected to make the tea are guests. At work, even the CEO has been known to make me coffee!

From the sounds of it, your cadet NCOs need to be put in their place (not by you, by an adult).

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5

Well I know what I would do but sadly it would not be considered in keeping with the ethos of the ACO.
Might also get you thrown out of anyone ever found out! But would probably be worth it.

Sensible hat time!
Otherwise yes speak to your OC, if that doesn’t fix it the call the child protection officer in your wing and report it as bullying as that’s what it sounds like.

If that fails then get your parents involved and go straight to your WExO

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6

Rob, I understand where you are coming from but this is an issue which I have brought up repeatedly in the most polite manner. I have not been brash and forward about it, instead neutrally telling the staff what has happened, which said NCO has denied and because she is an NCO the staff believe her because I’m only a voiceless little cadet and she’s not.

7

As I said to Rob,I have brought up this issue with the CoC numerous times,my parents have brought this up twice with CoC to no avail. OC just said to parents that Sgt was ‘a firm and strict NCO with good morals’ and that I should be ‘less thin skinned and more resilient’. If only he (OC) listened to the fact that I was called all names under t’sun by Sgt.

8

Just say no then.
When she kicks off ask to have this resolv d by the next rank up. Have her explain the problem and you can explain you feel bullied.
Or request a transfer citing this as an issue and the staffs unwillingness to resolve the issue.
Put it in a formal email and copy in your OC’s next in the CoC.

9

It appears going to your OC has had no effect. The chain of command is there for a reason. I wouldn’t go through them again, I would take this to your WSO or even your wing child protection officer & say you are being bullied by this NCO.

Which is what you are. SEVEN NCOs [TELLING YOU OFF] at once?! Nope, sorry. That is intimidation, bullying & not how the chain of command works. Never mind all the other ‘jobs’ you have. Folding her kit? Putting her sweet wrappers in the bin?!

Normally I would not advocate this but on this occasion I’ll make an exception. Next time she asks you to do something, say ‘no, sorry Sgt, I’m busy. Ask Cdt Bloggs’. Find a new cadet & help them with something, anything, on the Sqn (tell them your method for polishing shoes, give them a heads up on a lesson, ask them if they have any questions - anything that makes you look busy). That way you are not being rude to her, but you have a legitimate reason to say no. If she has an issue, tell her to take it to the SWO.

I don’t know if you’ve tried this already so apologies if you have.

One thing you haven’t mentioned however - where is your SWO in all of this? Have you mentioned this to them or just gone to the OC?

Do you have a staff member you trust? Could you explain to them what is happening & ask them to discreetly observe breaks (I assume this is happening during break as at all other time the staff should be with you). I did this when one cadet accused another of bullying. I just stood in the doorway or ‘made a cup of tea in the canteen’ & I was soon forgotten about, but was listening to everything that was going on.

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10

Oh, that’s an old hat, that’s my first try. She usually gets big CWO or FS to go and tell me to do it. If I still refuse, then more get involved, so in the end I’ve got 4/5 NCOs/staff all for a poxy cup of coffee so I just usually have to give in.

11

I’ve been to SWO twice. I’ve just to ‘be more resilient and try and not act like a little girl.’ Umm, ok,sir. :thinking:

13

Wow.

Sounds like the issues in your Sqn run deeper than just a problematic Sgt if your staff get involved & do nothing (ie she drags them in to the argument then you get press ganged in to doing whatever it is she wants to bully you in to doing that night).

How close is the next Sqn to you? Could you transfer? Again, not something I recommend (why should you move, when you’re not the problem?) but if it will cause you a lot less grief, maybe look in to it. You’re a cadet, you should not be subject to this level of politics, this bullying, this feeling of being alone.

As a member of staff I despair that cadets are in these situations, but that is a rant for another thread.

14

before going further anywhere… You have taken this crap until now deep breath and take it for another few months…
Get a diary and start putting in it what was said done and where… Tues 9 Aug told I had to fold and put her PT kit away for her.

Write it all down once you have it then get your parents go over it with them and then have them contact the wing HQ and ask for assistance. Once you have clear evidence then It helps and your memory is not enough as you can get confused where as if it’s written down it helps you!

Also you need to think carefully and clearly…
The rubbish to put in the bin, was it a case of you were beside it and she passed it to you to put it in as you were blocking her access?? If not then note that… Sgt xxx called me across the room to take her rubbish and dispose of it as she was talking to her friends

Also ask why it is always you making the teas and coffees, in my sqn my adj only lets 1 cadet make theirs as apparently she’s the only one that can make a decent tea what doesn’t taste like poison… The cadet laughs and takes this as a compliment. If it’s a case of punishment write that down.

I know you want it fixed here and now as would we but in your case take the crap for a bit longer and make sure it gets sorted correctly!

15

No, the rubbish is not next to my area. Not anywhere near. I repeatedly take the bins out. Every night like I do with the tea making and the bog scrubbing. None are that near to me so it’s a case of hearing her bellow “Cdt Random, get TheCdt over here to clear the bins,NOW!” This means I’ve usually got to haul myself over to the bins from toilet cleaning, stock counting in the shop or tea making to do it, which then means I’m running behind and can still have 2/3 duties to do while we’re forming up.

I usually make teas because I work in a cafe. Fair enough but it’s a bit annoying having to waste breaks making 8/9 cups of tea and running the NAAFI. I don’t usually get to socialise with other cadets.

EDIT: This is a reply to big_g

16

Fair enough she can’t claim it was because you were standing beside the bin…

As I say get it all written down, where when and then get on to wing[quote=“TheCdt, post:15, topic:2504, full:true”]
No, the rubbish is not next to my area. Not anywhere near. I repeatedly take the bins out. Every night like I do with the tea making and the bog scrubbing. None are that near to me so it’s a case of hearing her bellow “Cdt Random, get TheCdt over here to clear the bins,NOW!” This means I’ve usually got to haul myself over to the bins from toilet cleaning, stock counting in the shop or tea making to do it, which then means I’m running behind and can still have 2/3 duties to do while we’re forming up.

I usually make teas because I work in a cafe. Fair enough but it’s a bit annoying having to waste breaks making 8/9 cups of tea and running the NAAFI. I don’t usually get to socialise with other cadets.

EDIT: This is a reply to big_g
[/quote]

17

Just one question … have you mentioned this to your parents?
I cannot believe they haven’t picked up on what must be an unhappiness in terms of what you do in the ATC and asked you about it.
We always asked our kids if things were OK when they were at school and we could tell if something wasn’t quite right and would be prepared to take some action.

If mum/dad haven’t asked, tell them, explain what has been going on, tell them what you have said/done and that you are going to leave. They feel you should stay nudge them to speak to the CO and if that’s not fruitful the Wg Cdr. Speaking as a former OC being approached by parents / a parent about something like this is not a comfortable experience. Even less so if you as the CO have been spoken to about it and done nothing. The line that you are a subordinate and just have to put up with it, is complete and utter claptrap.

On a slightly different point we are fully expecting some of our 'just done their GCSE mob" to leave in the next 2-3 months as they get to grips with the next stage of their lives as they realise it’s not as cushy as the last 5 years (in terms of travelling to/from 6th Forms / colleges which won’t necessarily be as easy to get to, the workload and demands from college aren’t as low as school and part-time work to fund the modern teen needs) and the next 2-6 years will be more important. So if you decided that your time in the Corps was at an end you have reached a juncture ie moving onto FE or work, that has been a point of leaving for generations, so no one would think anything different.
Don’t worry about missing something by leaving, the only thing to take away from the Corps that has any direct resonance with the outside world is DofE and you can do that anywhere. Most schools run a DofE programme and LAs DofE centres, the ATC is not the centre of the DofE world and with some of the recent changes instigated by HQAC (albeit to bring us into line as I understand it with the way others do the DofE) there may be a drop off in the next few years.

18

Oh, yes I have mentioned it to my parents. Earlier on in the thread I said my parents have been in twice. Still nothing. My parents have seen the Sgt, but she put the waterworks on and denied most things, claiming that she was under a lot of stress from her AS Levels and she didn’t mean the yelling despite the fact that my parents have heard her doing one of her screaming/slagging off acts at me while on a sqn open day. She was in the next room to them and they heard her yell at me.

I have been seriously contemplating leaving for about 7 months now,I didn’t leave because the subs are paid on a quarterly basis and I had just paid my subs. I have even thought of taking a new job, where I would have to work a Saturday or Sunday and one weekday instead of the whole weekend.

Even if this hassle never happened I may have decided to leave the corps on the basis that doing 4 difficult AS Levels (2 MFL, Eng Lit and History),juggling the coursework and a job may not have been viable if I also stayed at cadets.

I may have to just resign my fate and say ‘I had to leave at some point, and my fate was sealed before I wanted it to be.’

19

If your parents have intervened and there’s not been any improvement, you have to wonder about the CO and their handling of this situation. An attitude of suck it up is not acceptable and not how the Corps works now and never really has accepted really ‘aggressive’ behaviour of one cadet to another, long before the introduction of ‘safeguarding’ and all that entails. Adult staff suggesting this should be suspended and have to do a full safeguarding course before recommencing their role.
I think your only option is to leave and get on with the rest of your life. I will say that this person has prepared you for some of the people you will meet as you go through life and I would thank them for this with a card and a kiss and be as acerbic as you wish to be.

As for them blaming school work pressure for their behaviour poppycock. One of the year 11s in my form last year blamed their poor behaviour at school on the pressure of doing their GCSEs. I took them aside and advised them that it was a poor excuse and if they can’t handle this then the rest of their lives will be an uphill struggle. They were fine in the year just gone, despite doing 4 A Levels, two of which I know they were really struggling to keep up with.

20

TheCdt. There are so many issues here. First ask your CO for a copy of the ACO anti bullying policy. Out line again to them what has gone on. KEEP A RECORD of this. If nothing changes put in a bullying complaint. REMEMBER, it is not others interpretation of bullying it is the receiver’s. If you feel you are being bullied, NO-ONE can tell you otherwise until an investigation has taken place. This is not normal behaviour, having you do the jobs listed is an abuse of rank and that should be looked into. If they claim it was a punishment, only extra duties can be given, again the jobs listed can not be classed as “extra duties”. The staff you have talked to are at fault also for making excuses and sweeping it under the carpet. Do not leave, see it through. Those that have done wrong must be made to take account for their actions. Good luck.

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21

I’d seriously be thinking about choke slamming her.