If your eldest has gone back and is living with the situation good on them, and they and the cadets from last summer’s escapade are giving them a wide berth, as that’s what you do in life. It would appear the younger sibling can’t get over it and this is what I feel is fuelling your need for something to be done and is in turn fuelling your youngest child’s anxiety. If they see you are able to move on, maybe they will. I would feel continuing would prevent them doing other things. This is ONLY Air Cadets and like any hobby only forms a few sentences in a personal statement.
I doubt the CO has taken sides, unless he has no life. When cadets bicker, argue or whatever I don’t take sides in any way, as I have more important things to worry about than teen angst, I’ve been through that and now have 20s angst.
I’m amazed the OC told you he hadn’t spoken to the other cadet. If a parent asked me if I’d spoken to or what I had said to a n other cadet or their parents, they would get a very, very short a short answer. If nothing else it’s confidential. I could imagine you wouldn’t be happy if he told anyone who asked what he said to you and yours. I would query why you’d want to know. What I say to cadets is between me and them and not to be disclosed, except to staff, just so they know what’s going on and don’t drop one.
You need to speak or have spoken to the LA as they are legal Guardians, not the carers as they will have to refer to the Social Worker about anything going on like this. If it is correct that the people collecting the cadet wore “ominous Social Service badges” they may have been at those times in a “home” not a placement.
I have had 3 foster kids as cadets and each time I have asked for a meeting with the social worker ASAP, so I know what I can or can’t say or do. Their names couldn’t be mentioned in any sort of press release or website article and they couldn’t be in any photographs, in the days before we asked for photo permissions. What you have seen is a child who will in all probability have come from an extremely dysfunctional family set up, with lots of moving around within the family and then between carers, which could well mean moving many many miles from their home town. Friends of ours fostered children for 23 years (while bringing up their own children) and they had placements ranging from a few days to 2½ years and several who they told us, had been given new names.
What would your action(s) and expectation(s) be if this had been with the same circumstances
On the street